#36 Embrace Your Metamorphosis
~ 8 minute read time ~
Spring has sprung, summer is on the way, lockdown 3.0 is finally easing, the birds are singing…
It’s almost as if everything is as it should be with the world. I’m as relieved and excited as anyone to have gained back many of our expected freedoms, however I feel a moment of reflection is prudent, even necessary to ensure that we carry forward the lessons from this past year.
To rush blindly into a ‘New Normal’ - an oxymoron* if ever there was one - disregarding the lessons we’ve learned during the struggles of lockdown and the collective loss of liberty would do a disservice to the experience. There is huge value should we care to reflect, learn and pick the bones out of the discomfort.
Having come through it, and respect to those who sadly haven’t, we must focus on our resilience and fortitude having navigated seemingly dangerous and unknown waters.
The thought of visiting family and being able to hug them for the first time in months is a wonderful thing to savour. Hopefully we’ll exercise gratitude and a sober mindfulness of what has come to pass, taking steps towards what a more open life has to offer, whilst negotiating whatever measures remain in place to ensure everyone’s sense of safety.
For me, I’ve found myself a little distracted, somewhat anxious and I wasn’t sure why. I soon realised that I’d stopped doing some of the things that worked so well for me during the multiple lockdowns - consistency is key. Chief of all was tricking myself into looking ahead, trying to make plans while imposing a false sense of control over what’s to come. Hence my unease.
I’d lost sight of the Now and accepting things as there are. Having written numerous articles emphasising the power of presence, knowing full well that the Now is all we ever have in any given moment.
The past and future are just mental constructs, time not linear - the past is formed of memories of time already passed, and the future is a mixture of hope of what’s to be, spliced onto a projected experience from the past. By overly focusing on either one or the other, it steals from our Now.
If I had any advice for people, it would be for us all to tread boldly forward enthused and hopeful with a renewed vigour, yet underscored with what we’ve learned from all these months of survival and, if we were able to face up to it, introspection.
I’ve recently re-committed to my daily meditation, breath work, exercise and healthy eating practices, adding a greater appreciation for inner stillness, these were the things that buoyed me during the darker days of lockdown. The things we did that allowed us to survive when it was dark will enable us to thrive when it’s light again.
As in boxing, we’ve rolled with the punches and parried some big shots, now is the time to come out of the corner and start throwing some punches of our own. Let’s keep our hands up while looking for openings, where we can unleash our magic and create the life we want.
Whatever you did during the last 12+ months that kept you afloat - look at ways you can continue and carry it forward. For me personally, cultivating an active practice of awareness and presence in everything I do is my biggest lesson in how to switch off the auto-pilot and live a more intentional life.
To go with an increased awareness I’ve also developed a more robust and gratitude-based mindset which serves to smooth out the potholes and bumps.
Another more recent lesson from NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) is to assume that there are no failures, only outcomes. This helps to take the pressure off yourself, because it removes the idea of judgement and the resulting emotional response around that, enabling you to act more freely in how you choose to live.
“How does it help… To make troubles heavier by bemoaning them?”
What has been your biggest takeaway from the time spent in lockdown?
How have you evaluated your life differently, if at all?
Have you re-prioritised what’s important to you, or are you generally unaffected and just desperate to get back to your life as you want it?
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
I re-prioritised a few big things, but then I needed to as I’d become aware that I was climbing the wrong tree. I was kind of limping forward with my life in many key areas, so in a strangely perverse way I am grateful for being given the time to reflect and re-design my life, not that I’d have wanted it to come in the way it did but I’ve made the best of it.
Often, positive change doesn’t come gift-wrapped! It comes in decidedly uncomfortable, sometimes scary forms - although it mostly depends on how much of a shock you need to be shaken from your inertia or apathy.
Enforced solitude will have affected many people in very different ways, some will have struggled, some will have made changes, some will have numbed the grim reality by bingeing on food/drink/Netflix to try and feel better - how are you coming out of lockdown?
Knackered, mentally and emotionally battered, gained weight or did you start a new hobby, are you a bit fitter, a little kinder, more patient with yourself - hopeful? None of the above?
There’s no need to judge how you handled lockdown one way or another, it was such an odd and novel (I balk at using the terribly overused ‘unprecedented’ so please forgive me here) experience.
Maybe, in time, we will look back on it as some kind of powerful social experiment? There will be so many studies conducted, data gathered and books written that, by the time our grandkids are learning about it in their history lessons at school, we should have formed our own thoughts and crystallised it in an almanac of our whole life experience.
Years ago, I remember asking my dear departed Nan about her experiences of being an evacuee in World War II, the impact of rationing on her family and wider society and being fascinated how they just got on with it and lived their lives as best they could within the parameters that were available to them at that time.
I loved hearing her stories of quietly stoic inner strength, which were always fascinating, told matter-of-factly without being overly embellished yet completely moving.
I suppose it’ll be similar for us as we emerge tentatively into this new situation to finally be able to hug each other, meet up for coffee and be sociable again all the while working within the framework that has been set by the powers that be.
What lessons have you learned?
What did you find out about yourself and what do you want from the rest of your life knowing what you know now?
What changes, if any, have you made?
What will you carry forward into this post-pandemic world?
What stories will you tell your grandchildren?
Will you paint yourself as a victim of circumstance or one of personal empowerment during a significant historical event?
One thing I’m quite sure of is, those who let go of their illusion of control, accepted what was happening with equanimity and attempted to find the teachings in such a challenging period, will be the ones to strive forward and, eventually, thrive.
Whether this past year was either the best or worst year of your life is up to you, but there will absolutely be no “going back to normal” - that ship has sailed.
Whether that upsets you or not depends on how you want to move forward or live in the past?
Like the caterpillar who has to completely breakdown into mush, whilst inside the chrysalis, to then emerge re-constituted as a beautiful new butterfly. If lockdown was us in the chrysalis stage, why would we want to come out of it as the same mushed up caterpillar (the past) when we could choose to progress and unfurl into the wonder that is a fully-realised butterfly (the future)?
Embrace your metamorphosis.
🦋
Love
LP x
*‘New Normal’ is an oxymoron because ‘new’ by its very definition means “something which is discovered or created for the very first time; not existing before.” And ‘normal’ means “conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected.
So please, let’s not perpetuate this ridiculous platitude!
Resources
Books:
Finding Your Own North Star - Martha Beck
Videos:
Can We Save Humanity? Jamie Wheal On Saving a Global Culture on the Brink of Collapse - With Tom Bilyeu
