#30 Healthy Scepticism vs Cynicism
~ 6 minute read time ~
“He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes; he who does not ask a question remains a fool forever.”
In the current climate of fear arising on multiple fronts; COVID-19 Lockdowns, political polarisation, divisions in society, re-appraisals of how we live our lives and what we want to do, people start looking for answers examining areas trying to find hope or, at least, some relief from the anxiety.
For a long time, I felt battered and weighed down by all the opinion and strong feeling emanating from people on TV, shouty types on social media and those who would rather die than admit their beliefs were not actually based on any truthful, provable reality.
I used to view the world in very concrete terms - the sky is blue, the grass is green and there were no arguments to be had in my mind, until I talked with a colourblind person.
People are really bad at changing their minds, I guess that’s why there is so much suffering in the Western world. We cling steadfastly onto things we hold to be true, that we exclude or preclude any other possible options.
“When we resist change, it’s called suffering.”
For what reason or purpose?
Why not take the life raft of accepting that a different ‘truth’ may in fact be a more accurate version than yours, rather than going down with the Titanic of your embedded opinion? How many bridges have you burned or opportunities lost because you just wouldn’t change your damn mind on something? I know I have, too many times for comfort so I’m speaking from painful experience.
I love to gently probe at people’s edges to see how they respond when asked questions on their ‘certain’ facts. I don’t mean any harm in it, I’m just embracing my playful, child-like nature - that’s why children drive parents nuts when there’s the constant “WHY?”.
Why is the sky blue Mummy?
Why does cheese taste like cheese?
Why do ducks quack and dogs bark Daddy?
Why do you get angry when I ask questions?
I used to be very opinionated around many subjects. I’d become defensive when something that I identified closely with was challenged and it would often lead to disagreements with family and friends. Now I realise it’s ridiculous.
“Your ideas are not your identity.”
Why not live in that uncertain space, why not admit you really don’t know much about anything? Life is neither black nor white, it’s multitudes of grey and all the other colours too. Life should be an exercise in empathy, try walking in another person’s shoes for a bit, try their opinion on and see if it fits. You don’t have to accept it, but you may learn something - multiple facts can be true without disproving each other.
There is no right or wrong. Even in science, a hypothesis exists until it is disproven by a significant enough margin, it’s then replaced with a new hypothesis until that is also disproven. There is no right or wrong, just better evidence and new thinking - it’s iterative.
Here’s a ridiculous ‘fact’ from the not too distant past:
Women were not permitted to run in the marathon (26.2 miles) because of the ‘fact’ that men thought their uterus might fall out over such a long distance.
I’ll pause here to allow that to sink in for a moment…
Then, in 1967 Katherine Switzer became the first woman to run the Boston Marathon as an officially registered competitor. Even though race organiser Jock Semple repeatedly assaulted her and tried ripping off her race bib number. Women were then banned until the Boston Marathon established an official women’s race in 1972.
The first time women were allowed to run the marathon in the Olympics was 1984, that’s within my lifetime!
My point, if I even have one, is that instead of practicing cynicism that only serves to enhance our own self-perpetuating opinions that then become our entrenched beliefs. Why not meet life with a healthy scepticism instead? Where asking questions becomes your modus operandi instead of making statements? Why not filter all inputs and test for rigour, validity and truth.
Thanks to the likes of Trump and the whole ‘Fake News/Alternative Facts’ schtick, misinformation is rife and opinion is passed off as fact. It’s dangerous and corrosive. Which is why I limit my intake of the News, I treat the News in a similar way I approach sugar in my diet - a little bit is enough but too much is really bad for you, especially if it’s been heavily processed.
Mark Manson, author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving F*ck, talks about curating your inputs carefully. Instead of getting your information or news from the same source each day, look around and read it from a completely different source. Why not go to a website you normally despise and read how they present the news for a different viewpoint?
He also highlights a clever study that shows the effects of anger in accepting false details - in short, when provoked to anger we become less rigorous in our thinking.
“Anger makes us believe dumb things.”
Carry your calm scepticism with you and test, test, test. Be your own scientist, look for rigour, ask yourself ‘does this pass my bullshit-o-meter test?’ We don’t have to take sides. Look at Zen philosophy, there’s always the middle way. When offered A or B, why not look to see if there is a C or a Z. Balance in all things.
Equally, the Stoics spoke of holding no opinion at all. Sometimes it’s perfectly fine to not form an opinion, especially if it’s an area you know nothing about.
“We have the power to hold no opinion about a thing and to not let it upset our state of mind - for things have no natural power to shape our judgements.”
Once we realise we are our own gate keepers for how we interface with the world, we can choose our experience according to how we filter things out. If you’re feeling anxious and uncertain, stay informed but limit the gleeful doom-mongering of the Media - they don’t care about our collective mental health, they just want website traffic, their TV channels plugged in to as many eyeballs as possible and as much outrage on social media because BAD NEWS SELLS.
Just because a talking head on the TV says something, it doesn’t mean it has to affect you or your internal state. Switch off the TV, or change the channel. Read a book. When I’m anxious, I make plans because it gives a semblance of control - even a vague plan with small achievable goals can bring immense comfort. Make lists and tick jobs off.
Be vigilant, yet remain open. Don’t close down or dwell in your own well of cynicism, this is what ‘they’ want - closed off, divided people become easier to control like herding sheep into a pen.
If we soften our positions, become less rigid yet maintaining a healthy calm and reasoned scepticism we can be actively connected, exchange ideas, energy and love in creating our own communities that are strong and can stand against the sponsored barrage of negativity puked into the world by these bilious organisations who profit from our collective misery.
Be more prepared to change your mind or, at the very least, entertain that there are many possible alternative views to yours. You’ll open yourself up to opportunities for learning, laughter and if we want to heal the rifts and divisions in our society, surely it’s easier to change your mind than it is to change the outside world?
Love
LP x
Resources
Books:
Think Again - Adam Grant
Videos:
Why You’ve Been Lied to About Where to Put Your Time, Energy & Focus - Tom Bilyeu interviews Seth Godin
